Update:

1. Yoga is more difficult than it looks. Who knew those useless out-of-the-way muscles actually had a purpose? And that they could ache for two days after being stretched?
2. It appears that I have automotive-related sadness in my future … transmission trouble looms. Uh-oh.
3. Hooray! For the first time ever, I got wireless networking under Linux working on my laptop. I’m running Linux Mint 4.0, and managed to get my Broadcom 4311 working using ndiswrapper after a few hours of dedicated sleuthing on the Ubuntu forums. Believe it or not, the wireless in Linux, using a bastardized Windows driver, actually delivers substantially higher throughput than the native Broadcom drivers do in Vista. *shrug*
4. Had a great escrima class yesterday. We worked a bit on “destruction techniques” — that is, how to win a fight by destroying your opponent’s soft tissues and joints. Scary how easy is in principle to really hurt someone, with just a little bit of training; an elbow can be a dangerous weapon. Of course, there is a wide gulf between grasping the simplicity of the theory and achieving competence in practice. But still.
5. Rick took me out for dinner on Tuesday … mmm, Indian food.  We had a good conversation about his future at the hospital.  I will enjoy giving him his “AutoTormentor 5000” next week.
6. I deployed a new template on this blog. Cuz I was bored.

A few things of interest:

1. I called Duane yesterday to chat; we conversed for two full hours, probably because — with the recent storms in California — he is without electricity and Internet access.  His semester ended well, though, and now he’s working on his thesis.
2. I signed up for yoga yesterday; I am taking a Level 1 class at The Yoga Studio on Tuesdays starting this week (sorry, Callista … my choice of venue is totally dependent on relative scheduling).
3. We celebrated Kyler’s third birthday (which is today), yesterday.  He was certainly a little bundle of energy.  Met my sister-in-law’s family, too.  Nice folks.  Brian certainly married into the right family.
4. Had about $400 in auto costs on Friday — two new tires, an oil change, and a transfer-case flush.  Amazing how nicely the Grand Cherokee drives when I have safe tires.

Duane used to laugh at me; back in "the day" (i.e., 2006) when we played World of Warcraft at the same time, I’d level a character through the mid-teens, then I’d get bored or frustrated and roll a new character.  My reasoning was always the same; I’d come across an inherent weakness of my current character’s chosen class, so I’d choose a new class or class variant and try again, to find the "perfect" character with which I’d make my way to Level 60 Overpowered Bliss.  It didn’t help that through the first couple years of the game, Blizzard Entertainment would regularly open new servers, so I’d hop from server to server to stay ahead of some magic curve, running through various permutations of warlocks and priests and shamans and druids with utterly reckless abandon.

Well, Duane might be astonished to learn that I have a character that is now about a year old.  On server Misha, I have an Undead affliction warlock named Elianna who is now … drumroll, please … about to hit level 29.  I logged into her for the first time in months last week, rather on a lark, and have decided to keep playing her, exclusively, until I get bored with the game again or hit 70, whichever comes first.  I only have two other remaining characters in all of WoW — a 23 Night Elf druid on Misha named Gillikus, and a 19 Tauren druid on Blackwater Raiders named Thundermane.  All other deprecated characters have been deleted.

My old friend might ask a question — what prompts the change of play style?  Before I can answer that, I need to share another anecdote.

Over the last year, as I’ve continued my karate study, I’ve been introduced to the fine art of free-form sparring.  You gear up (pads for hands, feet, head, and a mouth guard) and go at it against a friendly opponent.  It’s the application side of the theory and forms training of the regular karate classes.

I admit that I haven’t been to a sparring class recently; however, the early training forced a re-evaluation of some of my assumptions about conflict, both physical and political.  I had thought about self-defense with an abstract strategy in mind:  Keep distance, strike from afar, exploit openings created when blocking an attack.

Problem is, my body isn’t designed for that sort of approach.

I’m of average height (5’10"), below-average strength, and below-average flexibility (unlike some of my fellow students, I couldn’t deliver a well-formed roundhouse kick to the head to save my life), but I do have above-average cardiovascular function and above-average speed (when I slow down and relax, that is). 

Thus, a more effective sparring strategy for me is to quickly move close, strike hard and fast, and then retreat when fighting a bigger person — and do a lot of kicks and full-chambered punches when fighting a smaller person.  This is, however, inconsistent with what I would choose for myself in principle; I prefer the idea of maintaining distance and responding forcefully to an attack.  But if I fought according to the principles that I prefer, I’d lose more often than not.

This truth inspired an insight:  No general approach to a problem is bulletproof; to be successful in your efforts, you need to understand your strengths and weaknesses as they are — not as you wish they were! — and plan your tactics accordingly in response to an actual, discrete situation.

There’s no right way to prevail in a sparring session; there are only more or less effective techniques given a person’s abilities, relative to any particular opponent.  There is no "best" character class in WoW; there is only the fine art of learning to play the strengths and defend the weaknesses of your chosen class while exploiting the weaknesses of other classes.

Wishing might be great for fairy tales.  In life, as in WoW, wishing divorced from reality merely leads to a corpse run.

Today is the last day of 2007.  Tomorrow is the first day of 2008.  Worth some words.

Retrospective

It’s been a great year, in terms of values clarification.  As I go back and read entries from the early months of 2007, I think that the “where I am” position from a year ago has changed dramatically, in part because I engaged in a more thorough assessment of who I am, and who I aspire to be, during the early summer.  This led to a deeper desire to plan my way to a coherent strategy for achieving the long-term goals I’ve set for myself.

Of course, this hasn’t been a painless and bump-free process; it takes work to think through years of accumulated psychology and habit to break through to an authentic ideal-state for one’s whole life.  But I’ve done that, and it feels good. 

Over 2007, I’ve experienced some great things.  The Jon/Emilie wedding, the trip to Las Vegas, my time at East West Karate, the development of my workgroup at the hospital.  Some things, though, were less than pleasant — nerve damage in my foot, growing in awareness of my advancing age, watching friends suffer emotional pain and ongoing existential angst.

A.D. 2007 was a good year for me.  But I could have done more to make progress.

Prospective

I have some goals for the next year:

• PADI divemaster certification
• USPA “A” license
• Parliamentarian certification
• Complete the River Bank Run in May, a 25-K race
• Earn the purple belt
• Continue study of escrima and yoga
• Continue work with piano and singing

I also intend to continue the trend of getting healthier with every passing year.  Lately, it’s not much effort to hop on a treadmill for 60 minutes and run 6.5 miles.  But, now I must augment that with some strength training.  As I tell people — some days, it feels like I really do have all of the upper-body strength of a six-year-old girl, and working on my back will certainly make a difference for the post-obesity mid-back muscle tension I’ve been experiencing.

This will be the make-or-break year for establishing my consultancy and developing myself as a viable freelance writer.  It will also signal whether my sailing plan (Project 810) will founder under the weight of my own latent inaction.

Perspective

I suppose I’ve learned a few things of significance this year.  The first is that people have a remarkable capacity for self-deception.  Inasmuch as I fully concede that I also probably look at certain aspects of myself through rose-colored glasses, I’ve met a lot of younger people this year — in a variety of settings — who believe things about themselves that have little apparent basis in the truth as evidenced by their behaviors.  This is not a universal, of course, but still … it’s hard to engage with people on a deeper level when, as a conversation partner, one must reconcile the discrepancies between not just the person as presented, but also the person’s self-image as presented.

I also have been re-introduced to the timeless truth that every environment is inherently political, and the practice of easy geniality goes a long way to making one’s life less marked by unnecessary conflict.  The person who appears to be the statesman regardless of the setting is the person who usually earns the respect and social capital to fix a bad situation.  In this, observing a few of the brighter kids in USG has been illustrative.

Perhaps the biggest lesson is that any dream is achievable; we often fail to achieve our dreams because fear begets rationalizations that foster inaction.  Harness the fear, and the dream becomes a reality.  There’s a deeper wisdom to the “just do it” attitude than is immediately apparent to most.  As I consider the times this year that I’ve just done it, I realize that I’m a better person for having made the leap.

May your new year be safe, healthy, and profitable!

A few items of interest —

1. I really haven’t been doing much of substance lately apart from working, going to the dojo, and going to the gym.  My evenings and weekends have been occupied, but too rarely with matters of substance. 
2. I successfully tested today for the last stripe for my orange belt; in mid-January, I should test for green belt, which will mark an escalation in my training.  White, yellow, and orange belts get away with a bit less discipline than the green, blue, and purple belts.  Brown belts are in the final stages of preparing for shodan.  This intensification, combined with the very same escrima training that has left my arms bruised today, has presented some fascinating opportunities to learn about human physiology.
3. Thanksgiving was pleasant.  My adorable little nephew, Kyler, wanted to play with “Uncle Jay” the whole time, which was great but for his respiratory cold.  I solemnly assure you:  No amount of advanced infection-control training can prevail against an infected 3-year-old who wants to play.  Also, I used the opportunity of the downtime that day to watch all three Indiana Jones movies on DVD.
4. After much cajoling, begging, and pleading, Rick was finally elevated to the lofty status of 0.8 FTE in my workgroup.  Which is better than 0.4, I guess, although I will still mock him for being 80 percent of a man.  Rick’s change in status will be helpful when we really ramp up our performance analysis and improvement plan early next year.
5. Speaking of Rick, I had the opportunity to meet his delightful female companion, Sondra.  The three of us went to a late showing of The Mist, and then went to Steak & Shake for dessert.  He has done well with her.
6. Last weekend, what should have been a friendly dinner with Tony, Emilie and Jon in Lansing morphed into “Jason and Tony go to Southfield so Tony can get an eye exam from Dr. Jon before retiring to Jon/Emilie’s for early cocktails in anticipation of dinner, followed by several rounds of drunken board games.”  T-Bone and I ended up spending the night in their living room, then going — of all places — to Big Boy for breakfast before returning to Lansing and Grand Rapids.  The hospitality in Southfield was well worth the drive, of course.
7. I’ve welcomed the chance to assist the diocese in preparing the cathedral for Advent and (next weekend) for Christmas.  The Cathedral of St. Andrew is a beautiful old church, and being able to bring some order to the chaos is quite satisfactory.
8. Stacie and I finally got together for her long-delayed birthday meal a few weeks ago.  Went to a nice little place near Cascade, then went to the mall for some shopping before parting ways.  She certainly challenges me to think of things in new ways, and as always, I treasure those all-too-rare occasions when we cross paths.
9. My director received her long-awaited promotion to senior director.  This means the hospital world will continue to be marked by “interesting times.”  Probably some opportunity for development in my workgroup, a change that’s long overdue.
10. I recently finished The Voyager’s Handbook by Beth Leonard.  It’s a thick, hardcover tome dedicated to blue-water sailing, with an emphasis on living aboard a boat and doing substantial, long-term passagemaking.  One of the best books I’ve read in a while, and I felt a bit sad as I wrapped up the last chapter last night.  I’ll have to see if Rachael wants to read it.

/ramble

Wow … already the second half of November!

1. Enjoyed a lovely extended dinner yesterday with the ever-so-gracious director of Pastoral Services for the diocese.  Looks like I’ll be picking up more “work” at the cathedral — some sacristy responsibility for episcopal liturgies, and worship coordination for the spring series of Confirmations.  I enjoy this service, and am glad to be of assistance to the diocese.
2. On the subject … I served at a recent vespers service led by the bishop.  The service was in gratitude to diocesan musicians, and I was delighted that the bishop was frank in his pastoral remarks about the challenges and the opportuntities in Catholic liturgy and music that have taken root in the United States.
3. I’ve decided to postpone the November scuba training until February, and to take it at Key Largo instead of in Michigan.  There’s a great little school down there that does reef diving and individualized instruction at a great price, and airline tickets are still cheap for that far out.
4. Looks like I’ll be going to Ireland in early August.  The adult choir at my church goes each year, and this year, to get a better rate, the choir director asked me if I’d go (she said she’s looking for people who would be “fun to travel with”).  It’s only $2,500 for airfare, lodging, most meals, and full admissions over nine days.  How can I pass that up?
5. Ran into an ex-girlfriend a few days ago.  Made me think a bit … I guess I must be the only male in the world who never has catastrophic breakups that result in longstanding acrimony.  Except for the crazy woman earlier this year, my experiences have all been mostly positive.
6. I had been contemplating adding kendo (Japanese swordsmanship) to my martial-arts repertoire.  Changed my mind; I’m now taking escrima instead, under the watchful eye of one of the senior blackbelts at my current dojo.  Lots of fun, and an interesting second perspective on my overall training.
7. I think I desperately need to buy yet another new pair of running shoes.  Seems my feet continue to change shape the longer I run, and I’m at the point that on most days, after about 40 minutes of running, my right foot begins to tingle like it’s going to “fall asleep.”  Last time that happened with regularity, I ended up damaging my right sural nerve.  So time to go shoe shopping.
8. My little nephew dressed as the cutest little puppy for Halloween.  Kids are adorable at that age, in measured doses.
9. My prison schedule changed.  Instead of spiritual counseling/Bible study on the first and third Thursdays, I’m doing the first Thursday only, but I’m picking up the Communion service on the first Saturday.  So I’ll still be going twice per month, but it’ll be in the same week from now on.  This is good, because escrima is only taught on Thursday nights, so I only have to miss 25 percent of classes instead of 50 percent.  Plus, in terms of the prison ministry, conducting two very different sessions provides greater opportunity for spiritual growth.
10. I’ve had a lot of good luck lately with sitting down to write.  This bodes well.
11. Work has been frustrating.  Too much to do; not enough time to do it; people reacting instead of thinking things through. 

All for now.

A handful of observations:

1. This autumn in Michigan has been absolutely delightful.  Lots of sun, reasonably warm weather.  The colors are just beginning to turn — lovely.
2. It’s been about two weeks since I’ve moved.  I’m sleeping better, but it’s a bit strange, as if I’m living in a hotel.
3. We finally deployed the Performance Analysis and Improvement Plan that my department assembled.  Lots of work, but it’s a cutting-edge solution to managing the front-end revenue cycle for acute-care hospitals.  We’ve developed a complex, benchmarked metrics package, deviations from which will trigger an automatic Six Sigma rapid-cycle performance-improvement project.  Most of our metrics will be interpreted using statistical process capability tools, which haven’t yet been well-deployed in the financial sector of the healthcare industry.  Very cool.  Probably a publishing opportunity after we get some experience with this plan under our belts. 
4. For an absolutely delightful take on sailing around the world without a clue, read the Bumfuzzle blog.  The site — in great detail — tells the story of Pat and Ali, a young Chicago couple who decided to sell it all and see the world (after a single sailing lesson!) from a catamaran.  It’s quite endearing, and the stories are well told.  They sailed for about four years; now, they’re driving the world in a VW bus.
5. I’m tentatively planning to take scuba training over Thanksgiving weekend.  That will get me all but the four “field dives” (too cold in Michigan winters) for open-water diving certification.  Might take advantage of a great Key Largo diving package in January, though.  Goal is to get divemaster certification by the end of 2008. 
6. Project 810 update … I’ve got a great idea for a seminar series that I want to pitch to a few business contacts.  This is good.  And I continue to do a lot of reading of books and magazines and Web forums about sailing in principle.  Progress is good so far.  It’ll feel a bit more real when I do the scuba training later this month, I think. 
7. Earlier this week, my bank credited me the $580 from the Spirit Airlines fiasco.  However, for reasons that make absolutely no sense to me, yesterday I was assessed $175 in non-sufficient-funds fees for … not overdrafting.  Yes, you got that right.  $175 in NSF charges simply because my “available” balance fell south of the border while a transfer between accounts was pending, even though my ledger balance was always well into the green.  Try as I might, I can’t grasp the math of this, even after talking to a telephone service representative.  Although, I must admit, I was reduced to cursing at her when she tried to be helpful in offering me “overdraft protection.”  My response:  “Why do I need overdraft protection when I never f&^#*(% overdrafted!!!”  Ugh.  One step forward, one step backward.  Jason is cranky.
8. One side effect from the domicile relocation:  I’m much more regular in going to the dojo and the gym.  Five days per week.  Not bad.  At this rate, I’ll work off the Las Vegas buffet weight by Christmas, hahaha.
9. I’ve actually been able to get a little bit of writing done.  Woo hoo!

I’ve taken the MBTI twice in the last six years, and both times I scored solidly INTJ.  Turns out, there’s an online network/forum for fellow INTJs … which seems contrary to the personality type.  Hahaha.

At about 1 a.m. this morning, I locked the door on my apartment at Kellogg Cove for the last time. 

I moved in to that complex in April 2003.  When I did, I was met by an exceptionally sharp leasing consultant, a quiet community, and a great location near the 54th Street ramps to US-131 — perfect for managing my “Grand Rapids” stuff while cutting my then-daily commute to Kalamazoo.

I remember the early days there, when I wrapped up my undergrad work and began grad study.  I remember the ever-shifting furniture combinations, the late nights online, the joy of cable television, and the freedom of being alone.  Apartment #206 saw me gain, and eventually resign, an editorship; lose 110 lbs.; buy a new car; dip my toes back in the dating pool; lose a family member; find a new sense of purpose.

Over time, the early peacefulness of Kellogg Cove declined.  Our leasing consultant left and was replaced by a woman driven to get the complex to 100 percent occupancy, demographic fitness be damned.  Many a sleepless night were spent in frustration — silent, and not-so-silent — at the ever-shifting loudness eminating from #306 at all hours of the night.  The sense of community declined, too.  You could feel it not just in the complex, but in the local area, which suffered as the stabilizing forces of the middle class moved out after the M-6 “South Beltline” project opened a few years ago.  In fact, the last two years have left me quite unhappy with my accommodations.

Yet despite my frustrations, my last tour through the empty shell of what had been my home for the last 4.5 years did fill me with a bit of melancholy. 

As I walked out to put my keys and parking passes in the receiving slot at the leasing office, I visited my mailbox one more time.  Fill with junk mail, as usual.

I left it there.